The Teaches of Peaches
Peaches was so fucking good that my friend let some acne-plagued teenager grind her from behind just because she was to focused on enjoying the last encore. That’s love.
I decided 5 seconds into Peaches’ set that it was too good to take notes, plus I drank moonshine for the first time, so I’m not sure how skewed my retrospective analysis is, but let me say this, a Peaches concert could easily inspire a city wide orgy and after attending Sunday’s show at the Commodore I would gladly marry her and/or adopt her as my Mom.

Peaches works with the primary agenda of being fucking awesome and putting on a rad show, but she also works in the context of addressing gender roles, made clear by her album “fatherfucker.” Cause why is saying “motherfucker” so easy when you spill your cereal, but “fatherfucker” is worthy of a bar of soap in your mouth? The presence of gender bending is evident in her prop choices: a laser between her legs, a neon phallic saber, and a blinking light over her cooch.

I’m not really even into talking about male/female power role shit, all I know is that Peaches is hairy and looks like she stinks, but she’s fucking sexy. So is her female keyboard and guitarist who did a “Hegwig and the Angry Inch” transformation during the show from an Iggy Pop look-a-like into a sparkly-lingerie-wearing bombshell.

The whole show played out like a Broadway musical that your grandmother would hate. There were multiple costume changes, including an elaborate Elvis outfit for the last of three encores. The performance also included a parody on dear old Britney Spears and her disappearance from GM place after claiming there was too much smoke in the air. Peaches stormed off the stage claiming there wasn’t enough pot smoke. She also complained that the crowd at the Red Deer show was more amped to take off their shirts. I’m not sure why, but I was enraged by this fact, I wanted everyone to take off their shirts, and their pants, beat by Red Deer?! What an embarrassment, get naked! Prove our superiority! Make Peaches love us too! Then I remembered I was wearing a bodysuit which I’d never be able to put back on given my present state, and being nude in the Commodore ballroom when the lights go on and you see all the hideous sweat faces was just not what I envisioned for myself.

Anyways, she played everyones fave Peaches tunes and her stellar new material and it was one of the best shows ever. In conclusion, here is the Haiku that I was going to submit as the review, but I thought I’d get in trouble.
Peaches Haiku
Peaches, Camel-toe
Lazer beam where dick would be
Light saber hand-job
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wickeeedddddd!!!! wish I was there. Peaches is crazy gooooood.
you da best Bitch paws. I’m gonna go out and buy a light saber, or better yet i saw a youtube video on how you can make your own saber….. awsome!
Best show ever! Couldn’t agree more with the review.
….Especially the part about body suits!
Yow!
g-nius